As I write this, the first blush of Fall is in the air.  Everything in me seems to reset as I bring out my long sleeve, cooler weather whatnots and tie up the remnants of Summer.  I love this time, and I find myself taking inventory of all sorts of things that I still need to do to finish out the year intact. 

As the seasons change, so don’t we.  We hunker down, the pace of our lives changes, we become circumspect of where we are and where we are going.  We also can’t help but reflect on who is with us and who is not, what has worked and what needs a new direction. We make our lists and check them twice. 

One of the most difficult things to do, I think, is to come to terms with relationships that simply are not what we hoped for them to be.  We all have fair weather friends — those we know we can hang with, who are there when you are having a BBQ, but maybe not a breakdown.  There are family members and others, that our hearts pang to connect with, but the substance of their involvement tells a different reality.  

All of this causes us pause and prayer and evaluation. 

I don’t know if there is anything more painful than counting on someone that we love and have them turn away.  We have all had this experience in some form or another.  It’s devastating.  It shakes us at our core.

I have learned that there are those, despite how much we wish otherwise, that swim in the shallow end of our lives.  When we need them, yearn for them to come deeper into relationship with us, they will never do more than hang out on the edge, barely wading into the pool.  No matter what we do, how much we pray, this does not change. 

I have come to understand that people cannot give what they do not have within them.  

Jesus told the parable of the sower or the seeds.  Some seed fell on rocky places where the soil was shallow, unable to sustain itself.  Others fell among thorns, and were choked off and unable to come to its potential.  Still other seeds fell on good soil where it produced a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown before it.  

And so it is sometimes with people that we love.  

There is nothing we can do about how others act or sow in their life… All we can do is measure our own seed, cultivate our own ground, and be who we are called to be.

We can’t always be deeply rooted in every relationship.  We are not intended to be.  We are going to make mistakes, there are issues bigger than our ability to handle, and sometimes seasons will end and we must gather ourselves and move on. 

When we are faithful, when we look to God to supplement our lack, we can trust that He knows best.  When we do the right thing, He will honor it.  When we mix our seed, our intentions with His, we will produce a crop that is loving and kind and good regardless of how it is received by others.

Whatever we plant in love, is never wasted. 

Maybe you are yearning for a new harvest.   Maybe you are sowing seed but what you are praying for has not sprouted yet.  Maybe you are weary, no longer believing that what comes next will be any different than what you’ve known before. 

Keep sowing anyway.  

God is in control.  He is the God of miracles. He is with us in the shallow and in the deep.  He is there in our disappointments as He is in our celebrations.  He knows when our hearts break and when discouragement weighs us down.  He is tilling the soil of our faith, breaking up the hard parts, readying us for what is coming.

Your season is changing, and not everyone is intended to come along into it with you.  

Trust that He knows how it all works out and that it is good.

Sow and plant and pray and believe and don’t stop no matter what it looks like.

Your harvest is coming.

It’s all going to be alright.  

Mary Bryant is the author of "When He Walks Away… Hearing God When Your Husband Leaves Your Marriage,” a 5-Star Rated book available on Amazon